The Random Drunk Bastard Seal of Approval
◊ The other night I was in the city kickin' it with Owen at a bar and getting plenty drunk on an empty stomach. I'd packed my copy of Bloodsucking Freaks and was chewing him out for not having seen it yet, which is mostly my fault because I forget to subject him to outrageous, offensive B-movies when I am blind, stinking drunk, which we usually are when we hang out.
At the bar, though, I tried to make my case again. "Dude, you have to see this movie. It's crazy. It's just ... See, there's this midget, and a guy who runs a theater, and— "
The middle-aged guy who'd been talking shit about our sloppy drunk pool turned around and said "Wait! Is that the one with the midget running around holding two feet over his head? And the dentist? With the drill?"
"Yeah, man! That's it! You've seen it?!"
"Yeah, like, in the '80s. What's it called again?"
"Bloodsucking Freaks."
"Yeah, that's it!" He looked awed. Also drunk. "Whoa, that movie is ... wow."
"Yeah." I turned to Owen. "See? Even the random drunk bastard at the bar has seen it! Now you have to see it!"
And then we drank more, and I forgot about it completely until I got home and fished the DVD out of my backpack.
Damn.