Carry me, Gandalf
◊ OK, I geeked out and saw Lord of the Rings: Return of the King yesterday.
I've never seen so much hobbit bondage in my life. Ropes, blindfolds; it seemed like there was furry-footed kink going on every few minutes with Frodo "Bukkake" Baggins and his pipe-weed-loving crew. Yikes.
And damn, but that movie was long. My favorite character was Legolas because he was least prone to week-long restatements of the obvious. He'd open his mouth, say one succinct sentence, and then he'd go back to emoting with his eyes and making moony faces at Aragorn.